Sven: Did you just take a picture of the counter?
Me: Ah….yeah.
Sven: Why would you do that?
Me: Evidence.
Sven: Evidence?
Me: To put in my evidence folder.
Sven: You have an evidence folder?
Me: Of course I do.
Sven: What else is in there?
Me: Mostly pictures like this one.
Sven: Why?
Me: It’s just a precautionary measure in case I snap one day and someone around here winds up dead.
Sven: I don’t understand.
Me: I believe it will buy some sympathy, once the jury sees exactly what I’ve dealt with for all these years.
Sven: How thick is your folder?
Me: Oh it’s thick.
Sven: Well, I don’t think a folder full of premeditated evidence will buy you anything but a few more years.
Don’t all countertops look like that?
Hah! If only that wasn’t the truth.
I like yellow gloves and messy counter tops .. why wouldn’t you???? I truly don’t understand why you would not want to have a counter full of crap.
Don’t you sometimes wonder what kind of a counter top you have under the shit?