Is it Spring Yet? The Catnip Story Finally the long awaited catnip story makes its way to the internet. Have a chill day.
Is it Spring Yet? September 12, 2023 Grandma Has a Gripe What could Grandma Meow Moses, the finest of the fine, possibly have to complain about?
The Cleaver Family August 24, 2023 Heat Wave Causes a Dam Truce Some call it a heat wave. Some call it a truce. You be the judge.
The Cleaver Family August 13, 2023 The Cleaver Update Catch up with the Cleavers and all their doings in the black hole just outside Harmony Grove.
Is it Spring Yet? June 26, 2023 No More Mr. Daisy A magical ninety day adventure in the lives of Millie and Sven.
Animals are People too June 16, 2023 Tuna Was a Good Boy A moment to cherish when Tuna shows compassion.
The Cleaver Family June 6, 2023 The Black Hole Complaint Department Grandma Meow Moses tells it like it is as founder and head of the Black Hole...
Is it Spring Yet? May 30, 2023 Midwest Slammed with Decent Holiday Weather Decent holiday weather catches folks off their game in the Midwest.
Is it Spring Yet? May 19, 2023 Grandma Outlives Fountain of Youth Fountain of youth croaks and life goes on in the black hole just outside Harmony Grove.
Is it Spring Yet? May 4, 2023 Hunter Bunter Dear Hunter, Love and longing always. A year without you, cherished spots hold your ashes. Life...
Is it Spring Yet? April 26, 2023 Grandma Meow Moses and the Fountain of Youth Life has changed a lot since the days of Ponce de Leon.Ask Grandma.All I had to...
Who's Who Case April 18, 2023 Life After the Who’s Who Case Now that everyone is getting along. Let us catch up with Tuna and Grandma Meow Moses.
Is it Spring Yet? March 30, 2023 Watch Cat Tuna patrols his turf the same as Hunter Bunter always did. Hunter is on his way...
The Cleaver Family March 25, 2023 Mr. Cleaver Is Awake SEASON TWOOn the second day of spring, a blanket of snow covered the black hole just...
Is it Spring Yet? March 19, 2023 Feline Rastafarian Grandma Meow Moses lives in an assisted living apartment downstairs from my sweet Sven, Tuna our...
Is it Spring Yet? March 16, 2023 Hunter Learns to Fly Dear Mom and Dad,Sorry I haven’t written for a while. But you know that we are...
Winter Makes You Wonder March 8, 2023 The Cleaners Sven Eastwood and Tuna shine in their roles in the action packed hit series coming your...
Winter Makes You Wonder March 4, 2023 Cousin Love Tuna is pictured on the left. Lucy is on the right. Yours truly is seated in...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 19, 2023 Living on the Edge Most of the changes in our lives happen behind our backs.Like the flickering of lights meaning...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 14, 2023 Olivia Newton Reese They say the BS Club pot has grown larger than the power ball.Nobody has won in...
Dear Millie February 6, 2023 Millie Noe it All Love Expert Millie Noe it all, love expert answers her calling and your letters.
Who's Who Case January 25, 2023 Chapter 4 – A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series The adorable snitch tells it like it is.
Who's Who Case January 10, 2023 Chapter 3 – A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series An anonymous and paranoid cousin reveals the truth.
Who's Who Case January 6, 2023 Chapter 2 – A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series Does being eccentric make one a murderer? I think not, says Grandma Meow Moses.
Who's Who Case January 1, 2023 A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series This adorable little thug could not possibly be guilty of attempted murder. Right?
Winter Makes You Wonder December 21, 2022 A Winter Story Last week, I walked out the door one morning with a fresh brewed cup of coffee...
Dear Millie December 12, 2022 Millie Noe It All and a Secret Letter Millie receives secret letter from Furgatory.
Thoughts for Fall November 29, 2022 Turkey Day Ten days prior to Turkey Day here in the black hole just outside Harmony Grove, our...
The Cleaver Family November 18, 2022 Winter is Coming I have been binge listening to Game of Thrones on Audible.“What’s that Louisa?”Hang on. My sister...
Thoughts for Fall November 8, 2022 Cat Detective Caught Napping Fact.Tuna, a scrappy pre-teen punk in a suit, moved in with us October 2019.Fact.Grandma Meow Moses,...
Thoughts for Fall November 3, 2022 Behind My Bifold Doors I find it interesting that pairs of shoes tossed together into a closet never land together.Or...
Thoughts for Fall October 20, 2022 Fall It bet it was fall when my people, whoever they were, settled in the Midwest.“Honey, how...
Thoughts for Fall October 14, 2022 The Original Thelma and Louise “What’s our favorite word?”“Fob!” we yelled.“Who’s our favorite uncle?”“Lee!” we screamed.“What number do we hate?”“285!”And then...
The Cleaver Family September 28, 2022 Leave Er Be More of the Cleaver series. Adventures of Millie and Sven and the beavers.
Is it Spring Yet? September 21, 2022 Grandma Meow Moses’ Story The day my new parents, Millie and Sven came to pick me up from my apartment...
The Cleaver Family September 3, 2022 The Passive Aggressive War Millie was talking about their chaos filled lives that followed the loss of their beloved King...
Is it Spring Yet? August 26, 2022 A Letter From Furgatory Hi,I cannot believe it has already been four months since that nice lady with all the...
Is it Spring Yet? August 20, 2022 A Rhinestone Cowboy Not everyone could make it to Christmas at the cottage this summer.One of the missing persons...
The Cleaver Family August 3, 2022 Tree Huggers and the Cleavers When I arrived at the home of Millie and Sven, I found a petite woman in...
The Cleaver Family July 24, 2022 Dam Pond Here in the black hole just outside Harmony Grove sits a dam pond and next to...
The Cleaver Family July 6, 2022 The Cleavers “Did you hear that?” I whispered.My sweet Sven did not respond.I rolled over in the dark...
Is it Spring Yet? June 25, 2022 Flying Sisters “Look. A restroom,” said my sister.“Get on the plane.”“But.” she grumbled.I glared and she walked up...
Animals are People too June 6, 2022 The Next Chapter There are some big shoes to fill around here now that Hunter, king of the jungle...
The Cleaver Family May 21, 2022 Chaos Without a King Three kings and three decades later my sweet Sven and I remain here in the black...
Is it Spring Yet? May 17, 2022 Week One My sweet Sven and I have not been able to carry on a conversation without being...
Is it Spring Yet? April 22, 2022 Hunter Bunter In one fell swoop Hunter Bunter picked up his head, let out a bark, laid his...
Titanic Trio April 6, 2022 The Titanic Trio and Cuggly The Titanic Trio take care of the invasion of the opossum.
Is it Spring Yet? March 28, 2022 The Season in Between the Season in Between According to the placement of the moon and the sun and the stars and the prevailing...
Is it Spring Yet? March 12, 2022 Spring Training March is the month we Wisconsinites dream about.This is when euphoria hits us in the face...
Is it Spring Yet? February 26, 2022 Grandma Loses Dreadlocks Everybody has a secret.Grandma Meow Moses is no exception.Although she is often pictured on my website...
Is it Spring Yet? February 16, 2022 Cookie Eyes This is Hunter.He is our very own living legend here in the black hole just outside...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 2, 2022 Detective for Hire During the time in which I have been busy emptying, sanding and painting my kitchen cupboards,...
Winter Makes You Wonder January 6, 2022 Sven’s Cookies If your condiment shelf on your refrigerator door is held there by the grace of duct...
Titanic Trio December 15, 2021 Bark Man Has Something to Sing A Holiday special put on by the Titanic Trio. It is like no other.
Titanic Trio December 7, 2021 Christmas Tree Day and the Titanic Trio Super Heroes pick perfect tree.
Thoughts for Fall November 18, 2021 Murder in the Black Hole I am not counting the days.But it has been eight.On a cold and gray November 13,...
Thoughts for Fall November 3, 2021 The Other Cheers I do not remember my first visit to the dentist, which means I was either too...
Thoughts for Fall October 18, 2021 A Recipe For Thin Skin This is my Encyclopedia of 5,000 Spells.I picked it up with a few other books while...
Thoughts for Fall October 11, 2021 Titanic Trio and the Sinking Ship The Titanic Trio fails to sink Millie's ship.
Thoughts for Fall October 5, 2021 Grandma Meow Moses It was the tail end of the sunny season here in Wisconsin.That is why I was...
Is it Spring Yet? September 22, 2021 Never Ending Summer Ends The orange cones will forever be there and today’s Bloody Mary is as likely as tomorrow’s...
Titanic Trio August 29, 2021 Bark Man Adds Sling to Arsenal Bark Man has new weapon to assist with his crime fighting days.
Is it Spring Yet? August 26, 2021 The Main Event Twenty pounds of sloppy Joes, are twenty pounds too many.But, I am not here to complain...
Is it Spring Yet? August 11, 2021 Just a Little Side Story Keeler Christmas in August had quite a turn out this year.As Grandma Jan, would have said,...
Is it Spring Yet? July 15, 2021 Where Credit is Due Here in the black hole outside of Harmony Grove, where there are not enough gigabytes to...
Is it Spring Yet? June 29, 2021 The Coupon Boys For fifty dollars my sweet Sven and another coupon boy bought a brown boat of a...
Is it Spring Yet? June 22, 2021 Beware of Grandma These bright green eyes and whiskers belong to Grandma Meow Moses.We have another cat as well.He...
Is it Spring Yet? June 8, 2021 What is the Rush? “We are not in any hurry,” says my sweet Sven.“Why did you say that?”“Contractors love to...
Is it Spring Yet? May 28, 2021 Jurassic Yard It all began earlier in May when I brought home my first batch of flowers.
Titanic Trio May 4, 2021 The Titanic Trio Episode Three A typical day in the lives of typical super heroes.
Titanic Trio April 26, 2021 The Titanic Trio Episode Two Super heroes take super naps while Millie Noe enjoys a moment of silence. Do not miss it,
Is it Spring Yet? April 13, 2021 Grandma Jan’s Couch At first I thought it was the trailer causing all the commotion.Last fall my sweet Sven...
Is it Spring Yet? April 6, 2021 Paisley Moon Friends My sweet Sven and I took in Hunter when he was four.He had no place to...
Is it Spring Yet? March 31, 2021 The New Twenty Will you still need me? Will you still feed me? I just turned sixty-four.My sweet Sven...
Is it Spring Yet? March 23, 2021 Opposite Day in the Black Hole Opposite day.Bizarro world.You say goodbye.I say hello.However you want to put it, it happened here in...
Is it Spring Yet? March 16, 2021 Hunter, Moses and Punk “Good afternoon Ms. Meow Moses.” “Good afternoon. Thank you for having me.” “I understand that you...
Is it Spring Yet? March 3, 2021 A Day in the Life of a Picses It is March.Time to mess with Pisces.Which begins at the information window that one must visit...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 22, 2021 Cat Talk, the Season Finale “On today’s Cat Talk, Finley, the guy who tells it like it is, will finally tell...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 16, 2021 Millie Makes House Call On today’s Cat Talk, phamous pheline psychiatrist, Millie M.D. Noe, pays a visit to the home...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 10, 2021 One Rug, Two Rug, Three Rug, Dog When I called the agency, the woman on the line claimed they only had one left...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 7, 2021 Dance Party Animals As soon as I clear the coffee table from my dance floor, Hunter the resident puppy...
Winter Makes You Wonder February 2, 2021 My Sister’s Cat “Welcome to Cat Talk with phamous pheline psychologist, Millie M.D. Noe and today’s featured guest, Finley,...
Winter Makes You Wonder January 26, 2021 Cat Talk with Tuna Welcome to Cat Talk.Today Millie M.D. Noe, phamous pheline pyschiatrist and ….“What’s that Louisa?”Hang on. My...
Winter Makes You Wonder January 19, 2021 Cat Talk Join Pheline Psychiatrist, Millie M.D. Noe, with today’s featured guest, Grandma Meow Moses on, Cat Talk....
Winter Makes You Wonder January 17, 2021 Peace and Carats “I found the carrot,” said my sweet Sven with a mouthful.“The carrot?”“Yeah,” he said.And then he...
Winter Makes You Wonder January 7, 2021 Operation Clean Sheets It was a bright morning when I put the first load of clothes into the washing...
Winter Makes You Wonder December 29, 2020 Grainy Nundays My sweet Sven is chopping up kindling to start a fire in the wood stove.The TV...
Thoughts for Fall December 16, 2020 The Fat Lady Can Sing My sweet Sven and I believe that pets should be held accountable for their actions.That is...
Thoughts for Fall November 30, 2020 The Legend of Big Foot Yeti is real.He has been spotted on several occasions here in the black hole between Harmony...
Thoughts for Fall November 23, 2020 Cheers We Keeler brothers and sisters, will not be sitting around tables scattered throughout my kitchen and...
Thoughts for Fall November 13, 2020 November We Wisconsinites were recently sent a blast of unseasonably warm weather to start out month number...
Thoughts for Fall October 30, 2020 Powdered Sugar “Do not go near it,” said my mom.“But.”“No buts.”The reason we’d been following the truck around...
Thoughts for Fall October 19, 2020 Grandma Meow’s New Apartment If you live behind a curtain in a laundry room because the upstairs cat wants you...
Is it Spring Yet? October 15, 2020 Last Bloom I wasn’t always like this when I woke up. You know how it is when you...
Is it Spring Yet? October 8, 2020 Patrick Patrick heard the first chapter of, The Perfect Storm, while cruising around the countryside with his...
Is it Spring Yet? September 28, 2020 Procrastination Station [ proh-kras-tuh-ney-shuhn ]Such a confusing word, is it not?It infers that a person is pro putting...
Is it Spring Yet? September 13, 2020 Lost Art of the Hypochondriac I was in a deep trance and nearing Sticky Bay.All I could hear was the steady...
Is it Spring Yet? September 8, 2020 The Wedding Weddings are fun.But you know how it is for the people involved.There is so much stress.What...
Is it Spring Yet? August 29, 2020 A Love Triangle Of course I feel guilty.Sneaking around wears me out.Living a double life is exhausting.But it is...
Is it Spring Yet? August 11, 2020 Big Kids’ Hill If you were to take the skinny path on the left, the easiest way home would...
Is it Spring Yet? July 30, 2020 Of Mice and Me One cannot choose one’s lot in life.But, what one chooses to do after birth, is one’s...
Is it Spring Yet? July 21, 2020 Mashed Potatoes Do not let golden skin fool you.Sure.Those potatoes make crispy hash browns.And they steam like a...
Is it Spring Yet? July 16, 2020 The Cottage This story is dedicated to Jan and Susie.We miss you so.And to you Vicki.Although nobody can...
Is it Spring Yet? June 26, 2020 The Other Side You know those inspirational sayings about never really losing someone because they are walking right beside...
Is it Spring Yet? June 20, 2020 Tuna the Teenager If I open the closet door to throw an item into the recycle bin.Tuna pops out...
Is it Spring Yet? June 10, 2020 The Pretty Pond Hunter doesn’t do the dog paddle.He prefers to sit in water.On the thirty acre kingdom that...
Is it Spring Yet? May 28, 2020 Ants The internet is slow here in our little black hole.But my Sweet Sven and I don’t...
May 21, 2020 Grandma Meow Meow Moves In When I broke the news to Hunter, he picked his head up off the rug and...
May 15, 2020 The Impossible Movie Critic “This one is a comedy drama,” said my sweet Sven. “What year is it?” I said....
May 6, 2020 Too Old To Be Young My sweet Sven was standing in front of me. He had a funny look on his...
April 29, 2020 Four Legged Walkers Walking is good for you. Hunter, our little puppy dog who is ancient, Tunester, the cat...
April 19, 2020 Does This Mask Make My Mouth Look Big? Remember when Guess were jeans? Corona was beer? And when the Who was a band? I...
April 16, 2020 The Hunter and Tuna Connection Hunter’s side of the story. I do not hate Tuna. It’s just that I am a...
April 13, 2020 Conception By guest author Vol Lindsey 4/10/20 The pastures burn a brilliant green and stretch themselves out...
April 9, 2020 A Farewell to Maxwelle Smarte Tall, dark and handsome, Maxwelle Smarte and his equally pretty, fair skinned brother, Morrie Amsterdam, moved...
April 2, 2020 Sven Goes to Hollywood “I think I would be really good at that,” said my sweet Sven. “Really good at...
March 28, 2020 BS Club Goes All Techy “Get the App,” she said. And so we did. Because Angelique is brilliant. We in Wisconsin,...
March 24, 2020 King of Jungle Moves to Guest Room It is hard to know what is true and what is not true. That is why,...
March 18, 2020 The Accidental Hoarder About a million years ago when my Sweet Sven and I were first married, I had...
March 1, 2020 The Tradescantia Pallida Why was Shirlee-bunny on stage shaking a tambourine and singing, “You are some kind of wonderful?”...
February 21, 2020 Camel Straights My sweet Sven hurt his back. He is down for the count. A bench warmer for...
February 18, 2020 Don’t Fence Me In By guest author Vol Lindsey 02/17/2020 On the edge of town, here on my stretch of...
February 17, 2020 One Legged Nurse My Sweet Sven, and his side kicks, Hunter, AKA, Rin Tin Tin and Tuna, the only...
February 5, 2020 Minderella My sweet Sven and I have been invited to a ball. “What’s that Louisa?” Oh. My...
January 29, 2020 The Fun Committee Even if you travel all the way to the 0 mile marker. You will not escape...
January 5, 2020 Two More Poems by Vol Lindsey HELLO GOD It is the eighteenth of June and it is hot as soup. I’m smoking...
January 4, 2020 The House Guest Meet Tuna. Tuna is not on Facebook. But if Tuna were on Facebook his profile would...
December 18, 2019 Give a Dog a Bone Hunter has never enjoyed the act of giving. But he is an expert on the act...
December 6, 2019 Sparkle By Guest Author Vol Lindsey 12/5/19 SPARKLE Behind those piled stones, in the corner of my...
December 4, 2019 Slacker By Guest Author Vol Lindsey 11/29/2019 SLACKER I’m an old man now, so everything is a...
November 19, 2019 Wine Walking Women For a one time fee of just thirty-five dollars, Wine Walking Women, an elite group of...
November 14, 2019 AMHÁIN AMHÁIN DON BHÓTHAR By guest author Vol Lindsey 11/13/2019 My philosophy professor said, “The air in ancient Greece was...
November 6, 2019 Pockets of Fun It was spring. My sister Louisa and I were at the lake drinking beer and burning...
October 26, 2019 That One Guy Is Back Many of you out there say ixnay to the rakay. Not me. And not Hunter. Because...
October 16, 2019 I Hope It’s Not Raining In Reno A Millie and Sven road trip and slide show. The first night of our trip to...
October 14, 2019 No Time By guest author, Vol Lindsey 10/14/19 When you are seventy years old and a widow, there...
October 3, 2019 Lordy Lordy Look Who’s SEVENTY-SEVEN! Eleven years ago on this very day a little bundle of a puppy was born....
September 30, 2019 Most Wanted at the Car Wash “I am innocent!” I know. That’s what criminals always say. But in my case, it’s true....
September 12, 2019 The Heart of My Sole Sven bought a pair of new tennis shoes the other day because his eight year old...
September 6, 2019 Morphine and Toast “What is your pain level?” asked the pretty nurse. “Four,” answers my sweet Sven. “I’ll get...
August 28, 2019 The Staging Area Old dogs are peculiar. Especially if they were peculiar to begin with. And our Hunter, his...
August 22, 2019 Deliverance II The six of us waited in line to hang priceless ornaments as our mother unwrapped them...
August 22, 2019 Cardinal By guest author Vol Lindsey. 08/20/19 Cardinal (The color of love) They had been coming around...
July 24, 2019 Old Like Me In my twenties, I ceased to produce melanin in the roots of my hair. And then...
July 23, 2019 What’s That? By Guest Author Vol Lindsey 7/22/19 What is that down there at the bottom of your...
July 20, 2019 Dust To Dust By Guest Author Vol Lindsey 07/18/2019 I have said before that my brain has a mind...
July 17, 2019 The Accidental Athlete I had been pedaling my bike for days and days. Week in and week out. And...
June 19, 2019 That One Guy “It’s an eyesore,” complained our hoity toity canine. He was talking about the deck my sweet...
June 12, 2019 101 Reasons Not to Eat an Apple a Day An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Is a well known saying to a generation...
June 11, 2019 Almost No Regrets By Guest Author Vol Lindsey 6/10/2019 I turned 70 the other day. 70. I got here...
June 3, 2019 School of a Def Dog “Pour some sugar on me, baby!!!!” This is Hunter’s favorite line from Hunter’s favorite song. He...
May 25, 2019 House of Rude Sleepers Fine. I will admit it. I am a cover hog. But, that does not make me...
May 10, 2019 The Power of Paint When life gets you down. Get out your brush. Or else go to the hardware store...
May 3, 2019 The Mallow Cup Discussion “Everyone was doing it,” he said. My sweet Sven and I were sitting on our living...
April 24, 2019 A DEE-luxe Furnace Room The carriers were set in the living room. The doors were ajar. Max, the black cat...
April 16, 2019 Les Soups Stories Our favorite cookbook, like everyone’s favorite cookbook is worn out, full of scribbles and some of...
April 6, 2019 King of Jungle is Grounded Article by Gertie Judgemore Hunter, Tug-o-War Champion of the World and newly crowned King of the...
March 30, 2019 Retirement 101 Millie Noe here. Philosopher of life. Knower of all. Master of nary a thing. That is,...
March 23, 2019 Secret Lives of Kings of Jungles Hunter is my little puppy dog. And, King of the Jungle. The wildlife around here and...
March 18, 2019 Hotel Juniper My Sweet Sven planted a bush. “It’s a Juniper,” he said. “Oh,” I said. “Don’t worry....
March 4, 2019 The Other Long Winter By Millie Ingalls Noe “It was called, The Long Winter.” My sweet Sven was talking about...
February 23, 2019 A Single Key A twisted fable. My great grandmother, Big Grandma Noe, was a tiny woman. They say she...
February 7, 2019 Number One Fan Two weeks ago today my life was changed forever. Again. It is almost unbearable. But, the...
January 23, 2019 Pecatonica When I was a kid I wanted to live in Pecatonica. I didn’t know where it...
January 13, 2019 Pinheads My little puppy dog is not fat. His head is just getting smaller. And I just...
December 31, 2018 The Snowball Effect “Mom says you got the all clear sign, Millie!” said my sister, Louisa. “Yep,” I answered....
December 25, 2018 A Thumb is a Thumb It was a typical Sunday morning. I was watering the house plants in the loft. My...
December 11, 2018 Put on Your Party Dress Dear Millie, I am just not into it this year. I haven’t frosted a cookie. I...
November 30, 2018 Let Me Count the Days Remember how you walked in, back in 1983, filled out that application for that second shift...
Dear Millie November 16, 2018 Go Ask Millie Dear Millie, Last November I gave my fiancée a two carat diamond on her birthday.That was...
October 27, 2018 Nobody is Perfect After all of my Sweet Sven’s mathematical calculations, he came to this conclusion. “Hunter,” he announced,...
October 20, 2018 A Five Pound Aunt in a Ten Gallon Hat Not so long ago, hotel inspector, Millie Noe, visited the newly opened Muzz on Inn, located...
October 6, 2018 Bourne Again A Movie Review Hunter, Sven, and I, do not always agree. You see, I am not...
September 23, 2018 For the Love of Socks An Exclusive interview with the man with the most socks, my husband. “Sven, why do you...
September 7, 2018 A Microwavable Moment “What?” I said to my Sweet Sven. “Weren’t you listening?” “Of course I was listening.” “Then...
August 30, 2018 The Closer You’ve got your watch dogs, your lap dogs and your hound dogs. You’ve got your flea...
Is it Spring Yet? August 19, 2018 The Muzz on Inn Millie Noe, hotel inspector. On duty. It was easy to get in to this place. The...
August 9, 2018 Get in the Front And now, the line that made my mother famous. “Get in the front.” You might be...
July 21, 2018 The Other Venus and Serena Even though we only sing along with David Allan Coe a few times during the wee...
July 4, 2018 Dogs Just Wanna Have Fun Yes, they wanna. Yes, they wanna. Dogs just wanna have fun. Just because Cyndi sings about...
June 25, 2018 A Great Catch I wasn’t there that day. But I did notice the stump that was left behind. And...
June 14, 2018 The Lunch Bunch “You got yer deep fried turkey.” “Yer cream style turkey.” “Yer turkey fried steak.” “Would you...
May 29, 2018 Tug-O-War Once again, Hunter, Sven and I are revving up for the big day. To an onlooker...
May 17, 2018 A Documentary My sweet Sven is convinced that there are plans underway for his seventieth. “Why do you...
May 11, 2018 Give Me an F “I think it starts with an F,” said the little girl with directionally challenged, golden waves....
April 30, 2018 Iceland It is so easy. All it is, is water. I think the complication begins when you...
April 23, 2018 One Adam Hunter Hunter is one third lab. This is why he doesn’t pay any attention to any rules....
April 15, 2018 Norbert True confessions. By Millie Noe. It was dark. It was icy. And then I took a...
April 8, 2018 The Dog Who Cried Woof Remember when Lassie would let out one little woof and Paul Martin would say, “What’s the...
March 31, 2018 Life of A Pricing Specialist Everything I have ever aspired to be has begun with the letter A. Early on I...
March 24, 2018 A Story with a Slant Sven’s grandpa was hard of hearing. That’s why he used to park his red pick up...
March 9, 2018 Off the Back of a Box A girl can’t exercise these days without watching somebody sear a steak, bitch about our president...
February 25, 2018 A Punta Cana Connection I am still amazed at how many different ways a fart can be funny. I learned...
February 10, 2018 The DNA of a Snow Angel We were standing in front of my mom’s gas fireplace, toasting our buns. Our buns were...
February 2, 2018 A Grouper Sandwich The four of us were seated under the shade of a palm tree, around a white...
January 22, 2018 The Unsung Poet WELCOME TO THE MILLIE NOE, VOL LINDSEY, COFFEE JAMBOURI POETRY FACE OFF A NEW DAY My...
January 17, 2018 Sven Eastwood My sweet Sven has been accused of resembling Clint. You know. The movie star. My heart...
January 7, 2018 Is it a Bird? No. Is it a plane? No. Our perfect canine, Hunter, and I have a lot in...
December 30, 2017 This Morning I Woke Up Old This morning I woke up old. And I am already sick of it. Remember when you...
December 27, 2017 January the Second The Christmas tree is to the holidays what the centerfold is to Playboy. Imagine your disappointment...
December 20, 2017 Best Day Unlike Jack and Jill who went up that hill to fetch that pail of water, we...
December 14, 2017 Deck Your Balls with Max and Millie Max is partial to ladders and handy man tools. I am attracted to lights and sparkly...
December 3, 2017 This Dump Ain’t No Dump When I think of dumps I think of my sweet Sven. You see, we fell in...
November 24, 2017 Dear Millie and Maxie Welcome to Black Cat Friday. For all of you out there looking for answers to your...
November 19, 2017 These Boots A pair of boots popped up on my side bar. They were covered in peace signs...
November 2, 2017 Car 42 Where Are You? coach black fridaynorth face black friday Some people name their cars. Car 42 came with a...
October 28, 2017 The Mole It all started with that mole. You see, a little time had elapsed since my last...
October 22, 2017 The Psychatrist “What’s that?” I said to Sven, walking in the kitchen door. There was an opened card...
October 13, 2017 Red Rubber Ball I think it’s gonna be all right. Yes, the worst is over now. The morning sun...
October 7, 2017 A Diversified Living Room I was sitting on a chair holding a coffee cup the size of a thimble. It...
October 1, 2017 The Sun One Friday evening, not so long ago, Sven decided to change a light bulb. It was...
September 16, 2017 The Johnson Brothers There were four of us, my sweet Sven, Burt, Claudette and myself, staring into the yellow,...
September 5, 2017 A True Story about a special T-shirt The following story is about a donkey, a van and a T-shirt. The donkey and the...
August 30, 2017 Third Place And now, will the third place winner, please step forward?” Something went wrong out there in...
August 25, 2017 One Ringy Dingy Remember the operator on Laugh-In? Back in my mother’s day that was how you made a...
August 16, 2017 Pulp Reality I miss the flowers. Don’t you wish you could go back to a time when you...
July 30, 2017 The Ruby Marie My cell rang. I pulled it out of my pocket, looked at the name and let...
July 24, 2017 The Photo Bomber adidas yeezy It was last Thursday. It was five PM. I was starving. That is why...
July 16, 2017 True Confessions I married a bad ass. He was born on New Year’s Eve. The year was 1948....
July 6, 2017 Sergio and the Pope cheap air jordans More than thirty years ago I married my sweet Sven. A guy who...
June 24, 2017 Millie Noe, Sports Writer – A Bird’s Eye View Ever since the Yankees won the World Series in 1996 and the camera was forever on...
June 17, 2017 No Place Like Home Remember back when you were the same age as the amount of times you saw The...
June 6, 2017 Don’t Drink the Water yeezy boost 350 uk buy Remember when there was no need for bottled water? When you...
May 29, 2017 If You Can’t Be With the Toes You Love, Love the Toes You’re With This is a story of a day where nothing really goes right and nothing really goes...
May 18, 2017 George Meyer Taliesin What I really wanted was a dog. And I wanted a leash. I wanted a dog...
May 9, 2017 Duck Creek It was before Nafta and it was back when vertical blinds were popular. I know this...
April 30, 2017 A Gift of Zen from Sven nike roshe run 2 Maybe it was that story about the sterling silver rat earrings that...
April 21, 2017 Bird Watching 101 You might not guess that I am a bird watcher at first glance, because I don’t...
April 14, 2017 The Big Heist You’ve heard of The Thomas Crown Affair and The Maltese Falcon. You’ve seen Ocean’s 12, Once...
April 9, 2017 I SEE LONDON It was 3:00 PM. I’d just gotten off work and smelled of French Fries, rubber soled...
April 2, 2017 Another Case of Mistaken Identity I paid for my gas at the pump on that cold morning in November before the...
March 19, 2017 My Dad and Eric Clapton I was my father’s favorite. “What’s that Louisa?” Let me rephrase that. My Dad liked me...
March 5, 2017 The Rock-chettes “Millie, the name is pronounced Rah-chester. Not Rock-chester.” “No it isn’t. It’s Rock-chester.” “There’s no K.”...
February 22, 2017 Lobster Night The Trifecta Lobster Night is special. It is one evening a year that a certain gang...
February 13, 2017 Millie Noe, Love Expert Dear Millie, I have been dating Sherri for a couple of months now and I really...
February 7, 2017 This is My Side of the Story It was my first week in the credit department. I had a new desk and a...
January 29, 2017 He’s Perfect My puppy has been showing signs of dissatisfaction with his doctor as of late. Last year,...
January 24, 2017 Did Bob Dylan Die? “What?” I said to Sven. I was standing on the counter wiping off a shelf in...
January 17, 2017 I Won! The first thing I ever won in my life was a complete set of children’s encyclopedias...
January 2, 2017 The Unspoken Truth About the Jigsaw Jigsaw (tool), a tool used for cutting arbitrary curves That is what Wikipedia says. What Wikipedia...
December 30, 2016 Dear Millie Since you are an authority on holiday etiquette, I am hoping you can solve an argument...
December 26, 2016 Christmas and Cousins The ballerina is my oldest granddaughter and to her right is my youngest nephew. The year...
December 16, 2016 Dear Millie Adidas Yeezy Boost 350 V2 UK Black For Saleyeezy boost 350yeezy 350 boostyeezy boost 350 uk...
December 14, 2016 Dear Millie I am hoping that you can help me out. I have the greatest guy on earth....
December 10, 2016 Dear Millie I am twenty-eight. My girl, Suzette is the pertiest thing anybody ever did see. She’s got...
November 27, 2016 Scared Straight, The Real Story I have been washing the gray right out of my hair since I was a kid....
November 16, 2016 The Dark Night Remember that night? The one that started out as a balmy summer afternoon, and your friend,...
November 8, 2016 The Triple B Review The ALL-NON-inclusive Burnt Dam Hotel, located just outside Townsend, Wisconsin, has been sold. I know. Tragic.
October 30, 2016 Happy Condoween Why is October special? Could it be those leaf squalls slapping you in the face before...
October 11, 2016 I’m Eight and I Feel Great Until a few minutes ago, I was on top of the world. And then I came...
October 1, 2016 Thirty Years and Three Days I was not looking forward to the price the girl with the bleached smile was about...
September 25, 2016 Tell them Millie sent ya Stop in and take a peek. It won’t take long. There is just one book.
September 11, 2016 Last Summer Fling Life started out briskly the other morning. Dried poplar leaves twirled a foot above our driveway....
August 27, 2016 The Wiper from Hell Last winter we went skiing in Minocqua. It was on that trip that Sven discovered that...
August 17, 2016 The Millie and Sven Honeymoon “Oh my God,” I said, sitting on the seat of the city bus with my thirteen...
July 26, 2016 Up North She stomped away, all two feet of her, arms folded and her little flip flops on...
June 29, 2016 The Tooth Fairy I was under the impression that if I ever published a book, balloons would fall from...
June 12, 2016 The Chorus Frogs As we mature beyond middle age, the amount of time that was once spent doing the...
May 21, 2016 Woodstock the Movie “Well,” said my mother who was sitting across the kitchen table from me, “your uncle says...
May 9, 2016 A Must Read Do you know what DPI means? I didn’t either. It means dots per fucking inch. Do you...
April 26, 2016 The Dream Ride – Chapter One An unlikely road trip with an unlikely pair. See what happens when humor blogger Millie...
April 15, 2016 Thunder and Lightening My neighbor stood at the end of our driveway and continued talking as I swiped an...
April 2, 2016 The Children of the Grove It was early afternoon and my first born and I were hanging out in the kitchen. He...
March 21, 2016 The Birds and the What? I was eleven when my world all came crashing in. You know, the world before the...
March 13, 2016 Boat Sailing Days March. Best month ever. My sister Louisa, disagrees. She thinks April is the best. What? You...
March 5, 2016 The Devil Wears Green “Shit!” “What’s wrong?” said my brother. “I think I might have told Tee Jay, that I would...
February 25, 2016 Millie Meets a Poet I saw Canada for the first time in the the summer of 1986. That is...
February 18, 2016 Wilson Does this ever pop into your head while you are counting sheep? I know. Me too....
February 5, 2016 The Power of Static Electricity Remember when you used to drag your feet across the carpet and shock your brother with...
January 26, 2016 An Apartment Dog Who Moved to the Country Tosca Was adopted from a kill shelter, by a young couple, when he was three months...
January 17, 2016 The Black Hole “What are you wearing, Jake from State Farm?” I said into the phone. “I am not Jake, from...
January 10, 2016 Just Dance It is January and time to make a New Year’s resolution, that will change the world. That’s...
Winter Makes You Wonder December 31, 2015 A Millie and Sven Love Story Our noses are touching. “But, I don’t want to play golf,” I say. “If you try...
December 25, 2015 Merry Christmas from Millie & the Boys A Holiday Craft Recipe Our three granddaughters used to come over to help me ‘clean’ for...
December 5, 2015 All My Turkeys Why, do I look like I am standing on the set of, Days of our Lives? It is because...
November 21, 2015 According to the Internet Millie Noe has tennis elbow. And that’s weird, because, she hasn’t held onto a racket,...
November 11, 2015 What’s in Your Rearview Mirror? On that beautiful, sunny afternoon, I glanced in my rear view mirror. “Well, go around me,” I...
November 4, 2015 Lovely Daughter [one_half][/one_half] [one_half_last] I wanted to be Mrs. Brown’s, Lovely Daughter. I cannot believe that girl broke...
Is it Spring Yet? October 29, 2015 Burnt Dam Hotel “ROW LOW,” she said to my mother. “ROW LOW,” she said again. My mother just stared at...
October 21, 2015 Let it Snow Millie Noe’s agent. Millie Noe’s book. And Millie Noe. “I have to say, I think that it...
October 11, 2015 A Staycation with Hunter “I found my passion,” said Giselle’s sister one day, as we floated around in the warm sun,...
October 1, 2015 Time to Run I learned almost everything I know about horses by watching, Mr. Ed. So, it is not really...
September 20, 2015 Bobby McGee My eyes mist as I drive by the place they make sausage. I pray that a truck will not...
September 13, 2015 Leonard Tails – Five LEONARD 1989 – 1999 THE WORLD’S BEST WORST DOG SERIES – TAIL FIVE A day at the...
September 6, 2015 A Boat Named Caulk The saying goes that the best two days of your life, are the day you buy...
Is it Spring Yet? August 29, 2015 The Price is Wrong “Millie Noe, come on down.” Life is a game show. I prefer stories. And I don’t even...
August 20, 2015 Have a Little Faith in Me August 16th, 2015, 2:00 A.M. I was tired. I crawled into bed with previously unnoticed blisters on the...
July 29, 2015 Baseball Has Been Berra Good To Me Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night! My mother was eleven years old at the time. ...
July 18, 2015 Please Mr. Postman Look and see. Is there a letter? A letter for me? The following is a paraphrased email conversation,...
July 15, 2015 Message Pending I was twenty-three. I was pregnant. And I did not need to take Lamaze classes. “I don’t feel...
July 3, 2015 Did you say Shish Kabob? My eighteen year old eyes were just as wide as my eighteen year old mouth. I looked...
June 20, 2015 Ghosts Are People Too Prelude I do not like scary movies. Because they are scary. There is always the guy with the...
June 14, 2015 Millocrates Question: Why is there life? Millocrates: Life is nothing more than a record album. We all come out,...
June 9, 2015 Rock Star I don’t mean to brag, but I was once in a rock and roll band. Okay, it wasn’t...
June 6, 2015 BS Club Minutes May, 2015 BONJOUR MES AMIES! From le Club de BS. Le Club from hell. Le News Birthdays: [one_half] Une...
May 30, 2015 Copper Harbor U.S.A. “Uh-oh,” I said and dropped the bag of groceries. “Mom?” I thought she was right behind...
Thoughts for Fall May 22, 2015 The Imposter When I was in grade school, I loved math. Who didn’t like those multiplication flash cards? ...
Thoughts for Fall May 15, 2015 Time One minute we were hanging upside down from the monkey bars with pigtails and pixie cuts, singing, “It’s...
May 6, 2015 BS Club Minutes Avril, 2015 Welcomez to le fastest growezing clube en le worlde. Picturezed from le top to le bottom...
April 26, 2015 Sunny, Sunny Mexico “Is everybody ready?” she said. And then the instructor pressed a button on the radio. sitting...
April 18, 2015 Leonard Tails – Four LEONARD 1989 – 1999 THE WORLD’S BEST WORST DOG SERIES – TAIL THREE The Billy Goat I...
April 7, 2015 Millie is Cured Do you suffer from an acute, potty mouth? I did. And I don’t mean it was, A cute, as...
April 3, 2015 BS Club Minutes March, 2015 Welcome to Marche B.S. Madness Le top row, from le lefte to le right,:Ma Mere, Ma Soeur,...
March 29, 2015 Where is Hunter? Do your pets try to sabotage your vacations too? Do they see you packing your suitcase and...
March 23, 2015 Colonoscopy Day with Millie and Sven “You are a perfect asshole,” said the doctor as we stood in front of the screen, viewing...
March 15, 2015 Curling Ends With a Bang Last week was the finale of our Friday night mixed curling league. The club was full of excitement,...
March 8, 2015 The Death March, 2003 I like things that are shiny and new. Sven likes things that are dependable and old. It...
March 3, 2015 BS Club Minutes – February, 2015 BONJOUR Welcomez to le Club de B.S. I would like to dedicate this post to Patsy...
February 17, 2015 Liar, Liar, Purse on Fire I have an aunt named Susie Le Q. She sometimes thinks that I am her aunt....
February 10, 2015 Dysnavigatoria Clutchitis The inability to drive an automobile with a clutch. Para-reversaphobia Limited skills in moving a...
February 4, 2015 A Great Big Brownie Smile If you were a Brownie, you were on your way to becoming a Girl Scout....
February 1, 2015 BS Club January, 2015 Minutes [one_half][/one_half][one_half_last][/one_half_last] Featuring from le left to le right et le top to le bottom: Ma Mere...
January 23, 2015 The Sylvania Trek [one_half][/one_half] [one_half_last] Do not let your significant other shop for glasses unchaperoned. [/one_half_last] The year...
Thoughts for Fall January 13, 2015 Something in the Way He Moves…His Face He was five. He had freckles and he liked to climb trees. I was five. I didn’t...
Winter Makes You Wonder January 6, 2015 Millieda Marcos It looks like it’s already starting in this photograph. See how Louisa peers into the camera, but I...
January 4, 2015 BS Club Minutes – December 2014 BONJOUR Club de BS Minutes – Decembre, 2014. En Attendez, from le left to le right et...
December 27, 2014 The Christmas Crock-Pot After Black Friday, it is time for Millie Noe to go shopping. And she does, with gusto...
December 20, 2014 Leonard Tails – Three LEONARD 1989 – 1999 THE WORLD’S BEST WORST DOG SERIES – TAIL THREE The Jehovah’s Witnesses Once...
December 3, 2014 BS Club Minutes Novembre 2014 [one_third][/one_third][one_third][/one_third] BONJOUR. HELLO. HI. WELCOME.
November 27, 2014 SVEN THE ALMIGHTY HUNTER Sven has a Thanksgiving story he would like to share. It’s a story that I have heard many, many, times,...
Thoughts for Fall November 23, 2014 Office Safety 101 Congratulations ‘Future Brown Noser’ on completing ‘Basic Office Safety’. The new kid with peach fuzz has this...
November 15, 2014 The Short Life of a Gimp Artist Thursday was GIMP DAY. When I was a kid our house was just like ‘The Cleavers’...
November 8, 2014 Invasion of the Mushrooms Unless a flying saucer falls out of the sky and crashes on the ground right in...
November 4, 2014 BS Club Minutes Octobre, 2014 Pense twice before enterezing Et don’t forget to wipez les feetes. BS CLUB ATTENDEZ Ma Mere, Ma...
October 27, 2014 Leonard Tails – Two LEONARD 1989 – 1999 THE WORLD’S BEST WORST DOG SERIES – TAIL TWO Puppy Kindergarten That first...
October 18, 2014 Leonard Tails – One LEONARD 1989 – 1999 THE WORLD’S BEST WORST DOG The Beginning He was sound asleep. That’s...
Short Stories October 12, 2014 Queens for a Weekend Chapter I The day I made reservations at Le Sofitel, I had no idea I would be making them...
October 2, 2014 BS CLUB NEWS I took a vote with me and myself and I and ………… the outcome? It was unanimous. A...
Is it Spring Yet? September 30, 2014 Nobody Ever Asks That Question Remember back one day, long ago, when you were just a twenty-three year old girl and you were...
September 23, 2014 BS Club Minutes September 17, 2014 WARNING These People think they are French when they drink. BS Business I deliverezed les orders...
September 14, 2014 The Coffee Cup Garden What is a coffee cup garden? 1) Is it a beautiful place where you sit on a bench surrounded...
September 9, 2014 BS Club Minutes September 3, 2014 WARNING: DUE TO SOME DU LA CONTENTE ENSIDE CE POSTE, NO ENTREE VOUS UNLESS VOUS ES EIGHTEEN...
Short Stories September 6, 2014 A Massage is a Massage is a Massage I have no sense of direction. As in none. So, it was not a surprise to...
August 26, 2014 BS Club Minutes August 20, 2014 Le Club meets at Chez Delle por Opening Jour. More excitemente than opening jour du les Troutes. Picturezed...
August 19, 2014 BS Club August 13, 2014 Written in code to protect the guilty. Okay, okay, it’s a lie. Le Club de...
August 13, 2014 BS Club Minutes August 6, 2014 Read at your own risk. BS Conversations Shirlee – Bunny: Once I snugglezed les nuts du...
August 10, 2014 Squash Bugs Anyone? How do I know that my garden has squash bugs? Because the other day I was...
August 5, 2014 BS Club Minutes July 30, 2014 This club is not for pussies. BS Conversationnes Giselle: Louisa, I had une dreamez that...
July 28, 2014 The Trouble with Summer The trouble with summer is that floating with friends is not conducive to gardening and it seems that...
Thoughts for Fall July 19, 2014 Sherrie The first time I ever saw her was more than twenty years ago. I didn’t like her. I didn’t...
July 5, 2014 A Sac Religious Gardener My sister who lives in Georgia sent me an email last week that said, “My...
July 2, 2014 BS Club Minutes June 26, 2014 Warning! Danger! Warning! Danger! Keep OUT! Scary shit in here. BS Business I gavez ma...
June 24, 2014 BS Club Minutes June 18, 2014 Warning..this will be five minutes you can never get back. BS Conversationnes In order to protect les confidentialities...
June 17, 2014 BS Club Minutes June 11, 2014 Written in code to protect the guilty. BS Conversations Ma Soeur: Kaden came up behindez moi et...
June 17, 2014 Millie Makes a Splash Double Click on the link below to see Millie make good on her cold water challenge. Http://Youtu.be/IFzyqGcPWEg
June 14, 2014 It’s A Girl! That’s right folks, Millie and Sven’s Easy Girl has produced an offspring. “What?” “Oh, sorry. Millie...
June 11, 2014 BS Club Minutes June 4, 2014 Caution. Entrée at votre own risqué. Les Minutes When I walkezed en through le door, ma...
June 3, 2014 Yogi Bear and the Twister It was the third Wednesday of June. The year was 2004. The Place was Jellystone Park. It was...
Is it Spring Yet? May 26, 2014 Gardening Tips from Millie and Sven – Part II Memorial Weekend can be such a busy time, what with all the cookouts, parades and boat...
May 20, 2014 BS Club Minutes May 14, 2014 Officiale BS Business Ma Soeur: Millie, can vous drivez moi home? Moi: Oui. BS Topics and...
May 14, 2014 Gardening Tips from Millie and Sven Here we are already thinking of planting our gardens. I don’t know about you but my leaves are...
May 13, 2014 BS Minutes May 8, 2014 BS OFFIICIALE BUSINESS There was une officiale discussionne between Le Mere et Giselle as to which ecole...
May 7, 2014 BS Club Minutes April 23, 2014 Official BS Business It es le officiale celebrationne du les birthdays por ma souer et Giselle. Here...
April 22, 2014 BS Club Minutes April 9 & 16, 2014 Due to ma recente worldly travels, ce poste es le combinationne du le last deux meetings...
Is it Spring Yet? April 20, 2014 A Road Trip with Millie and Sven CHAPTER I It’s a shame that I did not write when I was...
April 1, 2014 BS Club Minutes March 26, 2014 I gotta clean. I gotta pack. I gotta pack. I gotta clean. Time is short and...
March 25, 2014 BS Club Minutes March 19, 2014 Where mauvais Francais flows like mauvais wine Officiale BS Business Le arrangementes have been made por le pickez...
March 18, 2014 BS Club Minutes March 12, 2014 Because not every club not needs a purpose Officiale BS Business Le Celebrationne du ma birthday :...
March 11, 2014 BS Club Minutes March 4, 2014 Le club avec la pizazze. Officiale BS Business Ma Soeur providezed moi avec le itinerary por...
March 8, 2014 Wham Bam Thank You Spam The other morning I about spit out my coffee. There were 61 comments waiting to be...
March 4, 2014 BS Club Minutes February 26, 2014 Le Club that just won’t go away BS Club Officiale Business I tried with out success...
March 1, 2014 The Yin & Yang of Millie & Sven Profanity shot out of my mouth for the first time at the age of eleven. It...
February 25, 2014 BS Club February 19, 2014 Le fastest growing club en les Etates Uni Mes apologies to all du mes amies. Ce...
February 19, 2014 BS Club Minutes February 12, 2014 UNE “SPECIALE” CLUB BS Business Nicolette (ma fille-en-law et Giselle’s fille) deliverezed les products por les beauties...
February 12, 2014 BS Club Minutes February 5, 2014 French Hell on Earth Officiale BS Business I droppezed off Le Mere’s recyclables that had been...
February 5, 2014 BS Club Minutes January 29, 2014 Featuring Le Mere: Le hostess avec le mostess OFFICIALE BS BUSINESS “What? Non officiale business? C’est domage. Okay...
February 1, 2014 REAL ID The last time I renewed my driver’s license they said it would be good for eight years. I...
Winter Makes You Wonder January 28, 2014 40 BELOW AND HOLDING STEADY It is forty fucking degrees below zero for the one hundredth day in a row....
January 28, 2014 BS Club Minutes January 22, 2014 Pussies KEEP OUT – Rated X Officiale BS Business Apply une card de le Amazon gift ento...
January 21, 2014 BS Club January 15, 2014 It’s a bird, its’ a plane….no wait…. it’s Club de BS.. Officiale BS Business NO OFFICIALE...
January 15, 2014 BS Club Minutes January 8, 2014 Spill le wine…Dig that girl…….BS es back, 2014. BS OFFICIALE BUSINESS Taking down les decorationnes por...
January 5, 2014 Butt Sisters Coffee hut “So,” I said to Sven……….”Can we buy that lot in front of the grocery store and...
The Twin Fork Bridge January 4, 2014 The Twin Fork Bridge – Chapter 2 CHAPTER 2 Dan had explained to me at the same kitchen table...
December 31, 2013 BS Club Minutes December 18, 2013 Where shitz de les bullers meet once a week. Officiale BS Business Due to all de les Holidays une officiale...
December 22, 2013 A HOLIDAY SHOPPING FABLE Luckily the f-bomb technically is not a swear word, so technically, I didn’t swear. I was...
December 18, 2013 BS Club Minutes December 11, 2013 Welcome to Le Club de BS. Cool Chats only inside. Officiale BS Business NADA. BS Conversationnes Moi: ...
December 11, 2013 BS Club Minutes December 4, 2014 Le Club EVERYONE is talking about. Officiale BS Business Tres excitemente officiale BS Business!! Ma shipmente arrivez from...
December 10, 2013 It’s a Boring Life Have you ever noticed that life can be boring? You get up, you shower, you get dressed, you push...
December 1, 2013 The Twin Fork Bridge – Chapter 1 THE TWIN FORK BRIDGE CHAPTER 1 It started like any other day. My alarm hadn’t...
November 27, 2013 BS Club Minutes November 20, 2013 Welcome to le dark side Offiiciale BS Business Une officiale vote was taken por to...
November 24, 2013 Write Down This Date Sunday November 24, 2013 Hear Ye!!! Hear Ye!!! Everybody!!! Grab a pen or open your Smart...
November 24, 2013 I’d rather take a bullet than sit here with this dog. We live in the woods. It’s deer hunting season. He...
November 20, 2013 BS Club Minutes November 13, 2013 Warning! Proceed with CAUTION. It’s not right in there. Officiale BS Business Le officiale business du jour...
Lies and Memoirs November 16, 2013 Lies & Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 7) 1976 – Misfit “Everyone who lives here is a misfit,” Charlie said. He was...
November 12, 2013 BS Club Minutes November 6, 2013 The Club that keeps the Voulez in the Vous. Officiale BS Business [one_half] Aurevoir Spider. [/one_half][one_half_last] Bonjour BS...
November 6, 2013 BS Club Minutes October 30, 2013 Welcome to Le Condo. Officiale BS Business I returnez le foil du tin that I borrowed...
October 30, 2013 BS Club Minutes October 23, 2013 Le Club that keeps on BS-ing. Officiale BS Business Les Holidays es approaching et when les...
October 26, 2013 Slimming down together, you and your pet. It occurred to me the other day that I do not make time to exercise. I mean...
October 23, 2013 BS Club Minutes October 16, 2013 LE CLUB THAT WILL LEAVE YOU SAYING, “WHAT LE?” [one_half] OFFICIALE BS BUSINESS Une officiale...
October 18, 2013 Decorating with Little Green Tomatoes Now that the growing season is over the question remains, what to do with all of...
October 18, 2013 Exicted once more – Day Seven I had a fine night of sleep, what with the new sheets and all. (See: I...
October 17, 2013 Day Six. I am almost as excited as I was yesterday! Day six has arrived. And do I have some stuff to tell you. Okay, so I get...
October 16, 2013 I’m excited – Day Five So, last night I woke up with a couple of awesome ideas that I wanted to write today. They...
October 15, 2013 BS Club Minutes October 9, 2013 Le Club where les cool chats hang….. Officiale BS Business: Une reminder: Birthday cards por Ki-Ki...
October 15, 2013 I am pretty gosh darn excited – Day Four It is day four of my vacation. It is an awesome, cool, dark and drizzly morning. It is the perfect...
October 14, 2013 I am pretty excited! Day Three. Here it is, my third day of vacation! I am pretty darn excited, what with having this week...
October 14, 2013 I am so excited – Day Two! Wow! Here it is day two of my vacation. I am so excited! If it weren’t...
Thoughts for Fall October 12, 2013 I am so excited! I am so excited. I have the whole week off work, the entire week all to...
October 9, 2013 BS Club Minutes October 2, 2013 BS Club – Strictly for French drinking idiots. Officiale BS Business: Ma Mere sounded une warning...
October 2, 2013 BS Club Minutes September 25, 2013 WARNING! DON’T GO BEYOND THIS POINT. WARNING! DON’T GO BEYOND THIS POINT. BS Officiale Business Moi: ...
September 25, 2013 BS Club Minutes September 18, 2013 Warning! This es le officiale entrance to Purgatory. Date: Septembre 18. 2013 (Ma fille’s birthday!!!) Temps:...
September 18, 2013 BS Club Minutes September 11, 2013 BS en Francais Date: Septembre 11, 2013 Les Temps: 84 degrees Meeting Place: Le Condo Attendez:...
Thoughts for Fall September 10, 2013 The Millie & Sven School of Dog Whispering Training your dog, Mille & Sven style. HOW TO STOP THE BEGGING Give him whatever he wants,...
September 2, 2013 BS Club August 28, 2013 For your own good…………keep out. Date: Wednesday August 28, 2013 Temps: 83 degrees Meeting Place: Le...
August 30, 2013 BS Club Minutes August 22, 2013 DANGER. WARNING. STOP. Date: Thursday August 22, 2013 Temps: 78 degrees Meeting Place: Le Condo Attendez:...
August 21, 2013 BS Club Minutes August 15, 2013 Mais Day! Francais Shit de la Bull beyond ce point. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le...
August 15, 2013 BS Club Minutes August 7, 2013 Another Exciting Chapter about NOTHING. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Les Temps: 77...
August 6, 2013 BS Club Minutes July 30, 2013 Keep Out: Unless you can take a lotta shit. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le...
July 27, 2013 BS Club Minutes July 23, 2013 You’re gonna wanna make a drink before reading this. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo...
July 20, 2013 Johnson Toast Private Eye – Chapter 3 CHAPTER THREE – SLICE OF Johnson Toast scanned the Sky Mall Magazine. He could find nothing of...
July 18, 2013 BS Club Minutes by Boat, July 16,2013 Warning, BS stands for BS. First of all I would like to extend mes apologies to...
July 2, 2013 BS Club June 26, 2013 Le Club no one wants to join. Date: Wednesday: June 26, 2013 Temps: I’m no meteorologist but...
June 25, 2013 BS Club June 19, 2013 Do not open your eyes until you are done reading this post. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere...
June 19, 2013 BS Club Minutes June 12, 2013 Attentionne! Delusional mademoiselles within. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Les Temps: Attendez: Ma...
June 11, 2013 BS Club Minutes June 5, 2013 Caution! Illegal business beyond ce pointe. Vous will be guilty by associationne if vous continue to read....
June 9, 2013 Johnson Toast Private Eye – Chapter 2 Chapter 2 – Shit on a Shingle “Dustin! Dane! Sombeody! Answer that door.” Laney shouted from the...
June 4, 2013 BS Club Minutes May 29, 2013 [one_half][/one_half] [one_half_last] Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Les Temps: 80...
May 31, 2013 BS Club Minutes May 22, 2013 [one_half][/one_half] [one_half_last] Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Les Temps: 70 degrees and a nice...
May 29, 2013 BS Club Minutes May 15, 2013 [one_half][/one_half][one_half_last] Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Les Temps: 79 degrees Attendez: Ma mere,...
Johnson Toast, Private Eye May 27, 2013 Johnson Toast, Private Eye-Chapter 1 He’s tall. He’s dark. He’s Johnson Toast, Private Eye. Johnson Toast has been lurking around for more than...
May 21, 2013 BS Club minutes May 8, 2013 [one_half][/one_half] [one_half_last] Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Les Temps: 78 degrees...
May 11, 2013 Must be Strong – Chapter 2 The question remains. Did Sven ever meet face to face with his only Facebook friend and his...
May 7, 2013 BS Club Minutes…May Day! May Day! Dare to survive les adventures de Millie et Friends at Le Club de BS. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere...
April 30, 2013 BS Club Minutes April 24th, 2013 Keep out unless you like to be tortured with nonsense that is told in a secret language to...
April 26, 2013 YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR The only credentials this Mole Exterminator Guy has is a Rabies Tag. As far as I know...
April 23, 2013 BS Club Minutes April 17, 2013 Attention! Warning! Entrée vous at votre own riske! Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo...
April 19, 2013 BS Club Minutes April 10, 2013 Warning! Warning! Restricted Area! This shit is not por les feebles. Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere...
Lies and Memoirs April 14, 2013 Lies and Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 6) 2010 – Making the Rounds After lunch when I stepped out of the K-Bar Café and into...
April 12, 2013 BS Club Minutes April 3, 2013 Beware: There is nothing but complete disregard for a lot of things on a lot of levels...
March 31, 2013 THE BALLS OF GROUPON Me: I can not believe Groupon’s balls. Sven: Who’s Groopon? Me: It’s not who, it’s what....
March 31, 2013 BS Club Minutes March 27, 2013 This area is strictly restricted por les misfits who like to believe that they can read en Francais. Meeting...
March 27, 2013 BS Club Minutes March 20, 2013 Warning, it is advised to think twice before entering Le Club de BS. Date: Le first jour de...
March 19, 2013 BS Club Minutes March 13, 2013 Warning: Language and Cocktail abuse within this post. Date: 3/13/13 Ma Birthday!!!! Temps: 33 Meeting Place:...
Short Stories March 16, 2013 Lucky They use to call my Dad Lucky and I still wear his old bowling shirt...
March 13, 2013 BS Club Minutes March 6, 2013 If vous do not like les French Accents avec les French slurs, aurevoir. Attentione, attentione, I would like to...
March 5, 2013 BS Club Minutes February 27, 2013 Keep out if you do not like likeable women who do not understand that cocktails do...
February 27, 2013 BS Club Minutes February 20, 2013 No Entrée Vous if vous do not care por le carefree use du Francais et le...
February 20, 2013 BS Club Minutes Februrary 13, 2013 Do Not Enter unless you like annoying, hilarious, crap written in an annoyingly, hilarious, fashion. And...
February 19, 2013 The Squirrel Just thought I would mention that the squirrel that used to live here, packed up his...
February 15, 2013 Lies and Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 5) 1976 – Sissy Sissy was on some sort of a pilgrimage that summer. She was...
February 15, 2013 BS Club Minutes February 5, 2013 If you do not tolerate cocktails et nonsense – keep out s’il vous plait.
February 5, 2013 BS Club Minutes January 31, 2013 No entree vous unless you like hick stories told ala Hillbillee Francais. Date: Wednesday: January 31,...
February 2, 2013 Must Be Strong Sven received an email from an old Coast Guard buddy about a month ago and ever since...
January 27, 2013 BS Club Minutes January 23, 2013 Warning: Keep out unless you like silly shit written in a silly way due to...
January 23, 2013 BS Club Minutes January 16, 2013 Date: Wednesday: January 17, 2013 Temps: 32 degrees Meeting Place: Le Condo Attendez: Ma mere, Ma...
Lies and Memoirs January 20, 2013 Lies and Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 4) 2010 – Livingston Mom and I didn’t have far to drive that Sunday morning but a...
January 12, 2013 BS Club Minutes January 10, 2013 Do not enter if you do not appreciate nonsense brought on by les cocktails. Date: Wednesday: January...
January 9, 2013 The Accidental Skier “Ouch. Jeez. What the?” These were the words that came out of Marty’s mouth after...
January 5, 2013 BS Club Minutes, January 3, 2013 Do Not Entree if you do not care for Bullshit written in Francais. Temps: 20 degrees...
January 1, 2013 Lies and Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 3) 2010 – Billings Mma Grace Makutsi had the two of us in tears. She’s one...
December 30, 2012 BS Club Minutes, Decembre 19, 2012 KEEP OUT: Unless you like to be shocked with horrifyingly boring stories told in a horrifying...
Winter Makes You Wonder December 25, 2012 Dead Mice Don’t Poop – A Christmas Story The spiders sat with fine hairy legs splayed in all directions. Some hung in the web. ...
December 21, 2012 Lies and Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 2) 2010 – The Detour “The L is silent, like in fish,” my mother was saying....
December 21, 2012 BS Club Minutes Wednesday Decembre 12, 2012 Warning, Warning….Do Not Enter if you are a language Snob.
December 20, 2012 The Story of Betty and Marlene [one_half_last][/one_half_last]I have been friends with Giselle for more than fifteen years. About eight years ago she began...
December 12, 2012 BS Club Minutes December 5, 2012 Warning: No Entrees Vous s’il vous plait if you do not care for le crappee use...
Short Stories December 11, 2012 A Thing of Beauty I had to kill him. He left me no choice. I asked him not to come...
BS Club Minutes December 7, 2012 BS CLUB Minutes – November 28, 2012 WARNING: NO ENTRÉE IF YOU DON’T LIKE NONSENSE OR TERRIBLE FRANCAIS Date: Wednesday Novembre 28th –...
Lies and Memoirs December 4, 2012 Lies and Memoirs of Gardiner’s Bakery (Chapter 1) 1976 – Rose Colored Glasses There are three things in life that scare the crap...
BS Club Minutes November 21, 2012 BS Club Minutes – Nov. 20, 2012 Date: Tuesday Novembre 20, 2012 Quel Temps et’ il? Une belle jour, chaud et 59 degrees...
Thoughts for Fall November 19, 2012 The Case of the missing Coconut Earring I lost one of my favorite earrings. It’s the partner to this one and I like...
Thoughts for Fall November 17, 2012 Opening Day It’s the first morning of hunting season and I usually wake up to the sound of...
BS Club Minutes November 14, 2012 BS Club Minutes – Nov 14, 2012 If you do not care for meaningless topics or crappy French accents then no entrée vous....
November 12, 2012 New Bear Scent – Just In An acorn, hanging by a thread, let loose and fell swiftly to the ground, where it...
Thoughts for Fall November 12, 2012 Hunter Moves In Sven and I share a love hate relationship with dogs. We can’t live with them and...
Thoughts for Fall November 12, 2012 A Few More Years Sven: Did you just take a picture of the counter? Me: Ah….yeah. Sven: Why would you...
BS Club Minutes November 8, 2012 BS Club Minutes – Nov 7, 2012 Les Minutes de Club du BS WARNING: DO NOT ENTER IF YOU DO NOT CARE FOR...
BS Club Minutes November 1, 2012 BS Club Minutes – Oct 31, 2012 Les Minutes de Club du BS Pardonnez moi pour la poor use de language de Francais. ...
BS Club Minutes October 25, 2012 BS Club Minutes – Oct 24, 2012 BS Club Minutes Please excuse any broken French that appears in les minutes du BS. I...
Thoughts for Fall September 25, 2012 Yellow Glove Season It is yellow glove season already. It’s here and I am not prepared. I don’t even...
Thoughts for Fall September 24, 2012 The Brighter Side of Death Even as a figment of an imagination I am the first to admit that death terrifies...
