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Dare to survive les adventures de Millie et Friends at Le Club de BS.

Meeting Place: Chez Le Mere – Le Condo Attendez: Ma mere, Ma soeur, Mon Amie Claudette, Les Chats: Maxwell Smarte et Morrie Amsterdam, et moi Les Temps: 74 degrees!! Refreshmentes: Le dip du la, B et la, L et la, T. Official BS Business:  Ma mere's birthday soiree.  La decision was made to go out por dinner at Les Acres du Greens Restaurante, on Mai le 18th, at 7:00 PM.  I have been assigned le assignemente to e-vite to les siblings avec ce information et get le official tally por la finale reservationne. BS Topics et conversations: Ma Mere said, "Millie, how was votre jour off du work?"  So I told ma story. "Ce matin I met mon ami Luke at le place por la painting de les automobiles. I picked Luke up so that la place por  la painting de les automobiles could paint Luke's automobile et then we went out por le breakfast.  Apres that we took mon computer to Le Squad de les Geeks, por la fixing.  Le Squad de les Geeks said they had to keep mon computer por a few jours."  "Oh c'est domage."  "Oui. C'est domage. Mais après all de la taking care de all de les businesses de les automobiles et les computers we went to le place de la golf du les miniatures."  "Vous did?" "Oui, et first we tried our luck at le cages de les battes."  "Vous did?" "Oui, et it was tres fun. I was hitting et hitting et hitting all de les balles avec mon bat, mais on une especial swing that was tres vite et strong, I missed la balle et I went around et around et around en une circle et then I fell over et landed on le ground. I had to jumpee up tres vite.  Les balles were shooting out de la machine at moi.  Luke was laughing et he said, "Vous are lucky that vous are wearing votre helmet."  "Mais, I didn't land on ma tete I landed on mon hand.  Je pense I might have broken mon hand."  I held it up to show Le Club, mais it looked fine.  Ma mere said, "Oh mon dieu! Are vous all right?"  Ma soeur said, "Vous did not break votre hand. Vous have une bruise."  Et then I told about le golf de les miniatures.  "Luke et moi played eighteen de les holes de la golf, et I had une hole en une!"  Ma mere said, "Vous did?  That is tres bon."  "Oui," I said, "Mais on le next hole I had thirteen de les strokes et ma balle would not stay out de la drink et I kept having to go ento le ditch to fetch it. Et Luke was non better than moi.  He has un neauvaux nick nommer, Monsieur Boomerang.   He  hit la balle into la mill de la wind et it came back to him et he hit la balle into le mill de la wind et it came back to him again, et he hit la balle into le mill de la wind et it came back to him again, et again et again.   He just stood there et kept on swinging avec le club et we were at le hole por heurs et heurs."  Then ma mere asked ma soeur about le training de le neuvaux monsieur who es learning to drive le grand truck por les lunches at l'ecoles.  This is what ma soeur had to say.  "Le monsieur is tres nice, tres grand et he has une tres awesome personality.  He even made Madame Mavolina smile du jour." Le Club de BS membres were en shock.  "How did le monsieur do that?" Ma soeur answered by saying, "I said to le monsieur,  "Monsieur, what did vous say to Madame Mavolina to make her smile?"  Et do vous know what he said?"  "Non," answered le Club de BS membres, "What?  What did le monsieur say to Madame Mavolina to make her smile?" Ma soeur said, "Le monsieur said to moi, "I aint tellin' ya."  "Hah!" Le Club laughed.  "Le monsieur sounds parfait por le job!"  "Oui," said ma soeur.  "He is une character avec les characters."  Ma mere said, "Mais could le monsieur do le job?" Ma soeur said,"Oui, mais he has un peur trouble getting ento et out du la truck." Et then ma mere told us de her strange dream.  "I don't know where I was, mais le speaker at la podium wanted everyone en le audience to bring les vegetables up to le front de la room.  Et he called out, "REPUBLICANS." Et then all de les Republicans stood up et they brought les vegetables to le front de la room et set them on le tableau.  I started to stand parce que I thought I was next, et then he called out, "TEA PARTIERS," et I sat back down tres vite et I was tres embarrassemente."  I said, "Ma mere, what kind de la dream is that?" "It's le kind de la dreams that I have."  Et then Claudette came through le door et filled her plastique glass por safety purposes full de la wine.  Ma soeur said, "Claudette, what le heck was le nommer de la dentiste who lived to be une hundred et practiced por une long, long time et he lived en le mason avec all de les daffodils?"  Claudette could not remember, et none de la rest de Le Club could remember. So, I called Sven on ma phone du cell, mais he didn't answer, parce que ma call was dropped. En sight de la hind, he did remembre et he was talking to moi on le phone, mais I could not hear him.  Anyway, Claudette called her mere.  "Dr. Ballman," her mere screamed ento le other end de la telephone et we could all hear so Claudette didn't have to translate le answer. Another agonizing mystery solved.  Et then Claudette noticed le cactus du la Christmas.  "Genvieve, look at votre blooms on votre cactus!  It es not le holiday du Christmas."  Ma mere said, "Je pense they nommer le Cactus du Christmas parce que le original cactus bloomed at le holiday du Christmas, mais it was probably en Florida or perhaps Jerusalem not en Wisconsin."  Then I sent une text to Giselle, parce que she could not make it to le Club de BS du jour.  'Gisellee we are eating all de le dip avec la B et la L et la T.  Le dip vous wanted le last weekend.  Le dip that ma soeur forgot en her refrigerator on le trip de les mademoiselles.'  Et then ma soeur told une story about la spider that she almost walked into ce matin on her way to le pot du café. "It was hanging from it's web en le middle de la room et I didn't see him.  All de la sudden he was right en front de ma face.  He was grand et he was fat et his legs looked like this." She held out les hands to show us.  "Mais," I said, "Louisa, une spider could not look like that.  Les spiders only have eight legs."  So then Louisa hid les thumbs et showed us again.  Et then ma soeur said, "Excusee moi, mais amies, mais, I must go to ma mason. Aurevoir et see vous le next week."  Et le Club said, "Aurevoir, Louisa, see vous le next week." spider hands Et then Claudette told une story.  "Mon dieu!  Mon fil keeps on taking all de les fleurs from all de les funerals to his mason.  Après his grandmere passé le last month he took beaucoup de les plantes.  Apres his grandpere passé ce month, he took beaucoup more de les plantes.  Mon file has non business avec all de les plantes.  He has non idea what to do avec les plantes.  He will kill them all morte, por sure."

And then it was time for Le Shake du Jour

Red Solo Cup Bartender du jour:  Claudette Numbre du jour:  5 Rules: Une dollar to play, five of a kind to win half de le pot, trois shakes et farming de la land es allowed. 1st Shaker: Ma Mere……………resulte…………deux  fives.  Whatever! 2nd Shaker: Moi…………resulte…….deux  fives.  So What! 3rd Shaker: Claudette………..resulte……..deux  fives Jeez Louise! So, now I understand le hurry that ma soeur was en. She didn't want to make une contribution to le Red Solo Cup.

Be sure to come back ce next week.

Vous don't want to miss what Giselle has to say when she receives le text about la dip du la B et la L et la T.
     

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