BS Club Minutes October 23, 2013

Welcome to BS Club

Le Club that keeps on BS-ing.

BS Date

Officiale BS Business

Les Holidays es approaching et when les Holidays commence, Le Club de BS jumpees ento actionnne. [one_half]Bev's bottle[/one_half]

[one_half_last]I delivered une officially emptied (by le club de BS) bottle du Jager which has been transformed by mon tres bon amie to ce tres beautiful decorationne (on le left) which will be put to usez at le mere's up et coming, fourth annual, Condoween Soiree.[/one_half_last]

Next, all de les nommers por le celebrationne du Christmas at le condo were thrown into un bowl de la wickers et Giselle had le officiale honor du drawing les nommers out du la bowl et ma mere jotted them down on le master list.  If any of vous have une axe to grinde about le nommer vous got, parlez directly avec Giselle about ce matter, s'il vous plait.  Et merci beaucoup en advance por votre patience avec Giselles's lack du patience.

BS Conversations

Ma Mere: Mon Dieu!  Did vous see les snows coming out de la sky? BS Club Membres:  Oui! Moi:  Louisa, let moi look at votre hair. Ma Mere: Porquoi? Ma Soeur: I put in une hair lifte. Ma Mere:  Vous mean les highlights? Ma Soeur: Non.  Une hair lifte. Ma Mere:  What es une hair lifte? Ma Soeur: Je ne sais pas. Ma Mere:  What did it do to votre hair? Ma Soeur:  Je ne sais pas. Moi:  Je pense votre hair es lifted over here. Ma Soeur:  What do vous mean? Moi:  It es higher on this side than on that side. Ma Soeur:  Ferme la bushe. Then le telephone rang et ma soeur squinted les eyes to read le ID de le Caller et passed le telephone to Giselle.  "It es Le Salon du la Main."  Ma Mere grabbed le telephone out du les mains du Giselle.  "Bonjour? Oh, oui, demain at 3:00.  I will be there.  Merci beaucoup." Et then I said, "Giselle porquoi were vous late to le Club?"  Et then Giselle told le story.  "I was doing ma proof de les readings et all de la sudden, I lost 216 pages that were fini."  Le Club Membres said, "Oh, c'est tragique!"  Giselle said, "Oui, et then I re-proofezed les pages et then I lost 110 pages!" Le Club Membres said, "Oh, Mon Dieu!"  Giselle said, "Oui,  so I re-proofezed les 110 pages again."  Le Club Membres said, "That es une lot de les proofezing." Giselle said, "Oui, et then when I sent les pages to le office they said they did not arrivez."  Le Club Membres said, "Mais non!  Les Damn computeres!"  Giselle said, "Mais oui!  Mais then I received une text that said, Do not worry Giselle, we have located les pages."  Next ma mere, ma soeur et moi,  told une story about our trip to Galena Il.  Ma soeur said, "So, we ordered trois chaud et spicy Marys that were Bloody et après le bartender set them down I asked por trois chasers de les bierres."  Giselle said, "Mais oui, of course vous did."  Et ma mere said, "Mais le bartender said we could not have les chasers de les bierres.  She said it es against le law."  Giselle said, "What?  What kind du la stupide law es that?"  Et ma soeur said, "So then I said to le bartender that I would like to order une bierre por us to splitez.  Et le bartender said that she could not give us une bierre to splitez parce que vous can not have deux drinks en front de vous."  Giselle said, "Could vous put une behind vous?"  "Hahahaahahahaha."  Et then I said, "Et les Marys that were Bloody were tres chaud avec les radishes du les horses et le sauce de la tabasco. That es when vous really prefere to have une chaser de le bierre."  Giselle said,  "Did vous ask por une glass du la water?"  Et ma mere, ma soeur et moi all looked at each other et we said, "Non, we never thought du that."

Et then Maxwelle Smarte  sat down right on top du la master list.

max on list

Giselle said, "Porquoi es Maxwelle Smarte sitting on le tablet?"

"He es just mad, parce que his nommer es not en le list." Et then ma soeur told une story.  "Une jeune fille at l'ecoloe was telling moi une tragique story about une accidente du un automobile.  Le monsieur ran straight into un tree et he was killed.  He had some kind du problem avec his health. So I asked le jeune fille if le monsieur was old et she said, Oui, he was 45."  All de les membres were en shock to hear that 45 was old.  Et then ma soeur told le story about une dream that she had about Giselle.  "Vous were super skinny et vous were wearing une dress that was covered avec noir et blanc stripes.  Not le upez et downez stripes.  Mais non.  Le kind du les stripes that go around et around vous."  Giselle said, "Oh, no, not moi. I would never wear that kind du les stripes."  Ma soeur said, "Mais vous did en ma dream, et vous were tres cute!"  Giselle said, "I was?  I was tres skinny et tres cute?"  Ma soeur said, "Oui. Mais vous were une tres skinny, bitche."  All de Les Club Membres laughed.  Ma souer said, " Et I was sad. I just wanted ma regulare Giselle back."  Giselle said, "Well, I am going to provez vous wrong.  I am going to get tres skinny et I will wear une du those dresses avec les stripes that go around et around moi et I will NOT be une bitche."  Et then Giselle spread some dip on top de une cracker et she ate it. Et then Maxwelle Smarte was trying to get le pen off le counter et he broke it en half et le spring came flying out.  Ma mere said, "Maxwelle Smarte, vous can not be in le drawing. It es por les peoples only." Et then we gave le mere une vite lesson on le call that es waiting on her telephone.  Vous see, on le last Sunday ma mere told ma soeur, "Vous call moi when vous get home."  So ma soeur called ma mere when she got home, mais le mere's telephone just kept on ringing.  So then ma soeur waited et she called again, mais le mere's telephone just kept on ringing.  Et then ma soeur called again, mais le mere never answered le telephone.  So then ma soeur drove back over to to le condo to see what horrible, tragique, terrifying thing had happened to le mere.  Et do vous know what happened?  Nothing.  Le mere was sitting on le couch parlezing on le telephone to mon frère et she did not know how to do le call that es waiting so she ignorezed it.  Apres le telephone lesson we parlezed por awhile about les nuts that es hickory. There were beaucoup en le yard du Claudett's fil et ma soeur said that he said on le Book de la Face, "This es ridiculous."  There were some en le dip avec le crème et les olives that we were eating too.  Giselle said, "Mon husband used to crack them en une vice en le garage, mais après that, it was too much work por to get them out du there. It es not worth it."  Ma Mere said, "I remembre ma grandmere sitting on le floor avec une newspaper spread out, full de les nuts that es hickory et she would pick out les petite pieces de les nuts une piece at une time. That es what she did.  There was non televisionne back then, vous know."  Then ma soeur said. "When I was en l'ecole du high ma favourite classe was chemistry et I got une awarde por being le best studente.  Giselle said, "Oh, oh. That was ma favourite classe too.  Mais, not le lab.  Je n'aime pas le lab.  Mais, I got une awarde en le classe du chemistry too."  Le Club Membres said, "Vous did?  Vous got une awarde too Giselle?  What was votre awarde?  Le Best Studente? "  Giselle said, "Non, not exactemente.  Ma awarde was, Clutz du la Year."  Hahahahahahahaha.  "Ma grande accidente was le time that I dropped le tres expensive et tres grande thermometer. It crashed to le floor et busted ento millions du les petite pieces."  Le Club Membres said, "Oh, Non!" Giselle said, "Oui. There were balles du les mercuries bouncing all over de la room. I thought they were going to have to close down l'ecole that jour."  I said, "Vous could have worn les suites por les hazardous conditionnes."

Et then it was time por le Shake du Jour

name drawing

Bartender du jour:  Ma Mere

Numbre du jour: TROIS
Rules: Une dollar to play, cinq of a kind to win half de le pot, trois shakes et farming de la land is allowed.
1st Shaker: Ma Mere……………resulte…………4!  Une free drink por le mere! 2nd Shaker: Ma Soeur…………resulte…….4!  Une free drink por ma soeur! 3rd Shaker: moi………..resulte……..ZERO! (Shut le 'F' Up.) 4th Shaker: Giselle………….resulte……….4!  Une free drink por Giselle!
"Vous might as well wait on le rest de us Millie.   Vous got ZERO."
Stop in le condo ce next week por to see if Maxwelle Smarte et Morrie Amsterdam ever found les  nommers en le basket.

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