Winter Makes You Wonder A Millie and Sven Love Story Our noses are touching. “But, I don’t want to play golf,” I say. “If you try golf, I’ll try skiing,” he says. My mono vision has turned Sven into one giant[...]
Winter Makes You Wonder The Cleaners Sven Eastwood and Tuna shine in their roles in the action packed hit series coming your...
Winter Makes You Wonder Cousin Love Tuna is pictured on the left. Lucy is on the right. Yours truly is seated in...
Winter Makes You Wonder Living on the Edge Most of the changes in our lives happen behind our backs.Like the flickering of lights meaning...
Winter Makes You Wonder Olivia Newton Reese They say the BS Club pot has grown larger than the power ball.Nobody has won in...
Winter Makes You Wonder The Case of Who’s Who The Plaintiff: Grandma Meow Moses (above right)Is suing the defendant for $5000.00 for ruining a pearl...
Winter Makes You Wonder Millie Noe it All Love Expert It is the official month of love. If you are in need of advice, ask Millie...
Winter Makes You Wonder Chapter 3 – A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series Chapter 3 – An Interview with the Anonymous Cousin Anonymous: an individual who remains unnamed or...
Winter Makes You Wonder Chapter 2 – A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series The Eccentric Eccentric: an individual who behaves in odd or unusual ways They say she came...
Winter Makes You Wonder A Who’s Who of Who is Attempting to Murder Who Series Chapter 1 – The Opportunist Opportunist: an individual who exploits circumstances to gain immediate advantage rather...
Winter Makes You Wonder A Winter Story Last week, I walked out the door one morning with a fresh brewed cup of coffee...
Winter Makes You Wonder Millie Noe It All and a Secret Letter Dear Millie Noe it all, My husband says that toilet paper should roll over the top....
Winter Makes You Wonder Detective for Hire During the time in which I have been busy emptying, sanding and painting my kitchen cupboards,...
Winter Makes You Wonder Sven’s Cookies If your condiment shelf on your refrigerator door is held there by the grace of duct...
Winter Makes You Wonder Dear Millie Dear Millie Noe it all, The other night my wife said, “Be careful. You are going...
Winter Makes You Wonder Bark Man Has Something to Sing “Cut! Millie, what the hell is that dog wearing?” Excuse me folks while I explain to...
Winter Makes You Wonder Christmas Tree Day and the Titanic Trio When it comes to Christmas Tree Day, it is hard to find anyone who does not...
Cat Talk, the Season Finale “On today’s Cat Talk, Finley, the guy who tells it like it is, will finally tell...
Millie Makes House Call On today’s Cat Talk, phamous pheline psychiatrist, Millie M.D. Noe, pays a visit to the home...
One Rug, Two Rug, Three Rug, Dog When I called the agency, the woman on the line claimed they only had one left...
Dance Party Animals As soon as I clear the coffee table from my dance floor, Hunter the resident puppy...
My Sister’s Cat “Welcome to Cat Talk with phamous pheline psychologist, Millie M.D. Noe and today’s featured guest, Finley,...
Cat Talk with Tuna Welcome to Cat Talk. Today Millie M.D. Noe, phamous pheline pyschiatrist and …. “What’s that Louisa?”...
Cat Talk Join Pheline Psychiatrist, Millie M.D. Noe, with today’s featured guest, Grandma Meow Moses on, Cat Talk....
Peace and Carats “I found the carrot,” said my sweet Sven with a mouthful. “The carrot?” “Yeah,” he said....
Operation Clean Sheets It was a bright morning when I put the first load of clothes into the washing...
The Tradescantia Pallida Why was Shirlee-bunny on stage shaking a tambourine and singing, “You are some kind of wonderful?”...
The House Guest Meet Tuna. Tuna is not on Facebook. But if Tuna were on Facebook his profile would...
Hotel Juniper My Sweet Sven planted a bush. “It’s a Juniper,” he said. “Oh,” I said. “Don’t worry....
The Other Long Winter By Millie Ingalls Noe “It was called, The Long Winter.” My sweet Sven was talking about...
A Single Key A twisted fable. My great grandmother, Big Grandma Noe, was a tiny woman. They say she...
Number One Fan Two weeks ago today my life was changed forever. Again. It is almost unbearable. But, the...
The Snowball Effect “Mom says you got the all clear sign, Millie!” said my sister, Louisa. “Yep,” I answered....
A Thumb is a Thumb It was a typical Sunday morning. I was watering the house plants in the loft. My...
Put on Your Party Dress Dear Millie, I am just not into it this year. I haven’t frosted a cookie. I...
Let Me Count the Days Remember how you walked in, back in 1983, filled out that application for that second shift...
Go Ask Millie Dear Millie, Last November I gave my fiancée a two carat diamond on her birthday. That...
Nobody is Perfect After all of my Sweet Sven’s mathematical calculations, he came to this conclusion. “Hunter,” he announced,...
Off the Back of a Box A girl can’t exercise these days without watching somebody sear a steak, bitch about our president...
A Punta Cana Connection I am still amazed at how many different ways a fart can be funny. I learned...
The DNA of a Snow Angel We were standing in front of my mom’s gas fireplace, toasting our buns. Our buns were...
The Unsung Poet WELCOME TO THE MILLIE NOE, VOL LINDSEY, COFFEE JAMBOURI POETRY FACE OFF A NEW DAY My...
Sven Eastwood My sweet Sven has been accused of resembling Clint. You know. The movie star. My heart...
This Morning I Woke Up Old This morning I woke up old. And I am already sick of it. Remember when you...
January the Second The Christmas tree is to the holidays what the centerfold is to Playboy. Imagine your disappointment...
Deck Your Balls with Max and Millie Max is partial to ladders and handy man tools. I am attracted to lights and sparkly...
This is My Side of the Story It was my first week in the credit department. I had a new desk and a...
He’s Perfect My puppy has been showing signs of dissatisfaction with his doctor as of late. Last year,...
The Unspoken Truth About the Jigsaw Jigsaw (tool), a tool used for cutting arbitrary curves That is what Wikipedia says. What Wikipedia...
Dear Millie Since you are an authority on holiday etiquette, I am hoping you can solve an argument...
Christmas and Cousins The ballerina is my oldest granddaughter and to her right is my youngest nephew. The year...
Dear Millie Adidas Yeezy Boost 350 V2 UK Black For Saleyeezy boost 350yeezy 350 boostyeezy boost 350 uk...
Dear Millie I am twenty-eight. My girl, Suzette is the pertiest thing anybody ever did see. She’s got...
Scared Straight, The Real Story I have been washing the gray right out of my hair since I was a kid....
The Dark Night Remember that night? The one that started out as a balmy summer afternoon, and your friend,...
The Triple B Review The ALL-NON-inclusive Burnt Dam Hotel, located just outside Townsend, Wisconsin, has been sold. I know. Tragic.
Happy Condoween Why is October special? Could it be those leaf squalls slapping you in the face before...
Thirty Years and Three Days I was not looking forward to the price the girl with the bleached smile was about...
The Power of Static Electricity Remember when you used to drag your feet across the carpet and shock your brother with...
An Apartment Dog Who Moved to the Country Tosca Was adopted from a kill shelter, by a young couple, when he was three months...
The Black Hole “What are you wearing, Jake from State Farm?” I said into the phone. “I am not Jake, from...
Just Dance It is January and time to make a New Year’s resolution, that will change the world. That’s...
Merry Christmas from Millie & the Boys A Holiday Craft Recipe Our three granddaughters used to come over to help me ‘clean’ for...
The Death March, 2003 I like things that are shiny and new. Sven likes things that are dependable and old. It...
Liar, Liar, Purse on Fire I have an aunt named Susie Le Q. She sometimes thinks that I am her aunt....
Dysnavigatoria Clutchitis The inability to drive an automobile with a clutch. Para-reversaphobia Limited skills in moving a...
The Sylvania Trek [one_half][/one_half] [one_half_last] Do not let your significant other shop for glasses unchaperoned. [/one_half_last] The year...
Winter Makes You Wonder Millieda Marcos It looks like it’s already starting in this photograph. See how Louisa peers into the camera, but I...
The Christmas Crock-Pot After Black Friday, it is time for Millie Noe to go shopping. And she does, with gusto...
Wham Bam Thank You Spam The other morning I about spit out my coffee. There were 61 comments waiting to be...
The Yin & Yang of Millie & Sven Profanity shot out of my mouth for the first time at the age of eleven. It...
Winter Makes You Wonder 40 BELOW AND HOLDING STEADY It is forty fucking degrees below zero for the one hundredth day in a row....
Butt Sisters Coffee hut “So,” I said to Sven……….”Can we buy that lot in front of the grocery store and...
A HOLIDAY SHOPPING FABLE Luckily the f-bomb technically is not a swear word, so technically, I didn’t swear. I was...
It’s a Boring Life Have you ever noticed that life can be boring? You get up, you shower, you get dressed, you push...
Must be Strong – Chapter 2 The question remains. Did Sven ever meet face to face with his only Facebook friend and his...
Must Be Strong Sven received an email from an old Coast Guard buddy about a month ago and ever since...
The Accidental Skier “Ouch. Jeez. What the?” These were the words that came out of Marty’s mouth after...
Winter Makes You Wonder Dead Mice Don’t Poop – A Christmas Story The spiders sat with fine hairy legs splayed in all directions. Some hung in the web. ...
The Story of Betty and Marlene [one_half_last][/one_half_last]I have been friends with Giselle for more than fifteen years. About eight years ago she began...